I need you like a heartbeat but you know you've got a mean streak, makes me run for cover when you're around. And I know that you see what you're doing to me, tell me why.

Cold As You

You never did give a dang thing honey but I cried, cried for you. And I know you wouldn't have told nobody if I died, died for you.
Just walk away, no use to fit in words that you would never say.
Every smile you fake is so condescending, count it all as scars you've made.
Now that I'm sitting here thinking it through, I've never been anywhere cold as you.

Broken

Just the start of a song that doesn't really rhyme a lot yet...

See I thought it was too late for you.
That if you loved me I'd tell you not to.
But now I've seen you again and it hurts more than ever.
Knowing that you'll never see me like you see her.
I can't stop thinking about what could have been.
I can't stop dreaming about what we could be.
And all the time you're hurting me, you don't see that I still love you.
You think everything's okay now, but my heart still stops when I see you.
Please tell me this will end soon, I don't even care how.
All I know is I'm so sick of being under this rain cloud.

I'm broken from the inside out.
And I know that it's not your fault.
But can't you see you could love me?
Can't you give us a chance instead of hiding?
I don't want to feel this way anymore.
But I can't help this love that I'm fighting for.
I want to move on, but when I look in your eyes,
You bring me life, without you I'd die.

Kanye West is a stupid slut. :D

"While some guys propose on a knee, Jesus proposed on a cross."

Watch "Sex, Marriage, & Fairytales || Spoken Word" on YouTube

The best way to bring joy to others is by being joyful. :)

Beautiful eyes. :)

I did this myself.

Sweetly Broken

"At the cross You beckon me, You draw me gently to my knees and I am lost for words, so lost in love, I am sweetly broken, wholly surrendered."

My Immortal

I'm not too messed up. I promise. I just thought this was a good representation of my past.

"These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real, there's just too much that time cannot erase." -Evanescence

The Shadow by Shannon Thompson

I've been attacked from all sides. Over and over again I've been hit. I'm covered in shadow. Darkness is all around me. And no matter how hard I try, no matter how fast I run, I can't reach the light. Again I'm struck down but fiercly I stand up again. As I am hit by another sharp, painful blow I start to grow weaker. I take a moment to rest my weary body and it suddenly dawns on me. That shadow, that thing that I cursed, that's His shadow. I've heard of Him before, but I thought that He couldn't exist in such a painful world. If He did, why would He allow so much pain? It all becomes clear to me as I look up at His strong form, blocking my view of my attackers. There are so many attacks. So many rocks and arrows and broken bits of glass and everything that symbolizes pain that haven't hit me. As I watch His strong figure in front of me, always watchful, always making a path for me, I realize He stopped the attacks. He sometimes allowed the enemy to try and harm me, knowing it would make me stronger and eventually bring me to Him. And when He knew I could take no more, when I was on the ground and shaking with pain and weariness, and could no longer stop those cunning attacks from our mutual foe, He stood in front of me. He took every blow. Every stinging, burning, crushing, cutting blow was taken by His own holy, pure, perfect being. Without Him shielding me from those unrelenting attacks, I would surely be dead. Fully seeing the meaning of that shadow, I cry out in shame. What have I done to deserve life? Why would He take so much pain for someone who had for so long cursed His very existence? Turning for just a moment, my Savior looks me right in the eyes and says simply "You are my child. I would do so much more for your life." His child? Me? He would call this pitiful, lonely, twisted and evil being His child? "You are so much more than that. You are My creation. Made in My image." His creation? Understanding washes over me like golden sunshine breaking through the thickest, grayest rainclouds.
I've finally found someone who loves me! In spite of my failures and all my wrongdoings He loves me! Fueled by a newfound joy and hope, I walk behind Him with a spring in my step. I no longer see His shadow as a curse, but as a blessing. A blanket of protection around me. And during those times of pain and weariness, I now trust my Savior to always take care of me.

This is me

Smiles. Guitar. Skateboarding. Those cold winter nights when you read a book next to a roaring fire. Cozy sweaters. Kittens. Mountain bikes. Hot chocolate. Going to the beach. Blasting music as loud as it'll go when your parents are gone. Jesus. These are the things I love. I may sound like your average, everyday teenage girl but I am far from it. Actually, I'm a princess. I'm a warrior. I'm a rebel. And I was once completely, utterly, and eternally dead. I had no life, no hope, no friends, and no purpose. Pain was my only companion. Every time I felt emotional pain I would run to the physical pain as a distraction. But this only made me more scarred. Inside and out. Life was dull and terrible and meaningless. Until I rebelled. Suddenly life was meaningful. I was passionate, driven, and motivated by some unseen force that kept pushing me forward. I was afraid. Sometimes I still am. But by now you're probably wondering what I mean by "rebel". Well I'm not talking about rebelling against parents or teachers or the government. I'm not the kind of rebel who drinks and uses drugs and swears and is impure. Because that's no longer rebellious. Over time society has convinced the majority of my generation that evil is fine. So society is what I'm rebelling against. Evil is what I'm rebelling against. Normal is what I'm rebelling against. Because normal's not enough. When I was was normal, I was dead. Now I'm alive with hope in my Lord. So look out. Fully relying on the strength of my Lord, I'm ready to take on the world as a rebel. My wounds are healed. I may still have physical scars, but spiritually I am renewed. Now my scars serve as a reminder of what I used to be, and what my Lord did for me. They're a reminder that His scars represent the ultimate sacrifice. Because through the wounds my Savior suffered on the cross, my wounds are healed forever.