How He Loves Us All

Today Pastor Tim spoke about trials. It was such a refreshing message. I know that no matter what I go through I can always rely on the Spirit of God in me to get me through. Tim's right. It's such an incredible thing to know that the Holy Spirit is inside of me! And that the God who breathed stars and caused a worldwide flood and created every person in this world loves me! Lowly, sinful, careless, clumsy me. He loves me eternally and unconditionally. That's just so, so, SO unimaginable. He's so amazing.

Uhmmm yeah... :/

So here's the thing. I liked you. A lot. And you seemed to like me too. I've had so many good times talking to you. I learned so much about you and did everything I could to show you I care. I know how many siblings you have and all their names, I know all your favorite music, and I know your favorite things to do. I'll never forget all the nights staying up til 2am spilling my problems to you and hearing some of your deepest secrets. I'll never forget every word you said that made me really laugh. I don't know why you're acting the way you are now... was I wrong all along? Are you only interested in my friendship, or maybe not even that? I don't know what to think. Lately you've been so distant. That sunshine that brightened my world not so long ago has all but disappeared in the thickest, darkest clouds I've ever known. Rarely does a ray of sunlight break through anymore. A week ago my world was perfect. Sure, I had problems with friends and family, but I always had you to go to. Now when I try to confide in you, I only get cold, disinterested responses, or no response at all. What are you doing? I wish I could read your mind... I wish you could see how hurt and confused I feel. Please, please tell me this isn't going to be the end of us. We've barely even begun.

Complicated

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated? I see the way you're acting like somebody else, it gets me frustrated.

Dissolved

I know she's prettier than me, and more talented, and more popular... but did you have to ditch me to be her best friend? You have no idea how much you're hurting me right now... I miss all the years when we laughed together about nothing at all, and when we went for walks and talked about boys, and how I cried when he broke my heart and you were there for me. I miss everything you left behind. It's all just stupid memories now... I pictured us always being best friends, we'd go to the same college, be roomies, meet handsome twins, be in each others' weddings, babysit each others' kids, even retire together. I pictured our friendship as lasting forever, and now you're choosing to give it all up. I thought you were the most loyal friend in all the world, I guess I thought wrong.

This is what I felt before he came along. I want to feel like that again.

My heart will sing no other name, Jesus. <3

Jesus I need your help!

Have you ever had the feeling that someone you REALLY care about is gradually falling away from the Lord and nothing you say or do seems to have an effect on them? I feel SO helpless and I hate it! I don't want to lose someone else... all I can do is hope and pray like I've never prayed before. I want so badly for God to work this one out... I'd give my life for ANYONE if it meant they could have the same joy I have. But for this person, I would give my life with a smile on my face. Because nothing would bring more joy than to see them living a beautiful life full of assurance in Jesus. Praying so hard. <3